Still Learning

Even though I’ll be turning 48 in a few weeks, I feel that there is much more for me to learn.  I admit, I’m a late-bloomer.  I’ve always been afraid to learn new skills in fear that I’ll fail and look foolish.  I’ve let fear hold me back in a lot of ways.

Off the bat, I should’ve remained in community college when I had the chance, those many many years ago.  Back then I was taking the basic; math, English, shorthand(does anyone still do shorthand?), typing(on an electric typewriter), German, and History.  A very full schedule indeed. But I overloaded myself and dropped out.  A big regret in my life.

And secondly, getting myself mixed up with drugs and alcohol.  A very bad combination.  I thought I would be more accepted if I did these things.  I thought I’d be the life of the party and that guys would finally like me.  It only led to a lot of heartache and stupidity on my part.  So I won’t be doing that again.

There are other regrets, like not doing enough to help other people.  And wanting to learn Spanish, Sign-Language, crocheting, and sewing.   When I look around at the women I know, they seem to all have these wonderful and amazing talents that I do not possess.  And it makes me sad inside.  I am a late bloomer. 

But now I need to look ahead to the future and let God lead me where He wants to.  I need to keep my eyes wide open and savor each new opportunity that arises.  New friends.  New skills.  The beauty of a new sunrise and the birds singing outside my bedroom window during the warm weather months.  I need to read my devotionals and let the word of God sink deep into my thirsty spirit so that it can keep me nourished throughout the day.  For we all know that each day has enough troubles of its own.




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